The little things indeed count. Ironically, most marriages end prematurely because the couple hadn’t been able to agree on the tiny little things that are expected to spice up the marriage instead. Some of those things include;
Being secretive with your online activity
Smart phones, social media and 24/7 internet access can be great tools to help us stay connected, BUT they can also create dangerous distractions and temptations that could potentially harm your marriage. The moment you find yourself having an online conversation or visiting a site that you hope your spouse doesn’t find out about, you’re already in trouble. Be honest and transparent with each other. Let your phones be a tool to keep you connected with each other; not a wedge to drive you further apart. Talking about it, laughing about some of your online activities will even make the bond stronger.
Pausing the marriage while you’re raising your kids
A lot of marriages suffer from this. They find it difficult to find a balance between child upbringing and companionship. Some couples reduce their relationship to a partnership in co-parenting, and when the kids finally grow up; they discover that they have created an empty nest and an empty marriage. Give your children the gift that comes from seeing their parents in a loving, thriving marriage. Model the kind of marriage that will make your kids excited to be married someday.
Putting your “feelings” over your commitments
There are going to be days when you might not “feel” like being married, but feelings are fickle and they were never intended to be our primary advisor in major decisions. “Feelings” often lead people into adultery. The healthiest couples have discovered that love is a commitment; not just a feeling. Their commitment to each other perseveres regardless of what they’re feeling. The strength of that commitment allows them to have a deeper intimacy, a stronger connection and a happier marriage.
Making decisions without consulting your spouse
Our pride can often convince us that we don’t have to answer to anyone, and we should be able to make decisions without consulting anyone. Pride so often will lead to divorce in many marriages. Decision making as a married person should be a team effort, a consensus that you and your spouse must have reached. Try not to make decisions without consulting your partner first.